How to stop overeating in the evening: Practical tips from a therapist
If you find yourself overeating or bingeing in the evenings, you’re not alone. As a therapist who has personally recovered from this pattern, I want to start by normalising this behaviour: there are understandable reasons this keeps happening to you and many people feel stuck with these issues.
I remember how isolating it was to feel out of control around food and how frustrating it was that nothing seemed to help. But I didn’t realise I was looking in the wrong direction to implement change. The more I tried to control my overeating, the more compulsive my behaviour felt.
Fortunately, there are some strategies which can help. Let’s explore some of these together to help reduce evening overeating and, just as importantly, the guilt and shame that can often come with it.
First, let’s normalise overeating in the evening
Evening overeating can happen for a variety of reasons. It might be due to unmet physical, emotional or psychological needs during the day, or it could simply be a habit that’s developed over time.
Many of us use food as a way to unwind or cope with stress after a long day. Emotional eating is normal and everyone does it to some extent (think celebrating with birthday cake or eating ice cream after a break up). It doesn’t make you “bad” or “weak.” It simply means your body and mind are looking for comfort and balance. The problem comes when it is your go-to for managing stress or life’s challenges.
The good news is that there are steps you can take earlier in the day that can make a big difference.
Fuel your body consistently during the day
Skipping meals or under-eating during the day can set you up for evening bingeing. Your body needs consistent energy to function properly, and depriving it often leads to cravings and overeating later.
Eating not enough food or inconsistently slows down our metabolism, which makes us feel tired and it becomes harder to lose weight as the body goes into energy saving mode to protect from starvation. Eating regularly also helps to stabilise blood glucose which can reduce the intensity of cravings (particularly for sugary foods) and improve our mood.
Some people have tried intermittent fasting where eating is avoided at certain times of the day despite feeling hungry or less is eaten on particular days of the week. I remember being so confused as I was being told that fasting was good for me but I began to recognise that there was a relationship between fasting, being overly hungry and overeating later on. It’s so important to listen to how your body responds and what works for you and not just what the experts say is ‘healthy’.
In these circumstances overeating or bingeing is normal and your body’s way of keeping you ALIVE in response to perceived famine and scarcity (your body doesn’t know you are trying intermittent fasting, on a diet or eating ‘healthy’ and thinks food is scarce). This is sometimes called ‘rebound eating’.
I remember feeling scared of eating more during the day (‘that’s the only time I feel in control so I should make the most of it!’). I was worried it would make me gain weight. Knowing that eating regularly can fire up your metabolism and making changes in small steps can be helpful for overcoming this fear. Experiment and see what feels like just enough of a challenge for you. Finding the balance between staying too safe (no change) and overwhelm (too much change at once).
The standard advice is to try to have 3 meals and 3 snacks spread out at regular intervals during the day (but if that exact routine doesn’t work with your schedule you can modify it). Ensuring that you don’t leave a long gap between eating events (perhaps no more than 4 or 5 hours) so your body (and your psychology!) knows that food is coming and you are safe.
Takeaway tips:
Eat regular meals and snacks throughout the day - perhaps 3 meals and 3 snacks (or find a pattern that works for you)
Avoid leaving too long gaps between eating (e.g. not more than 4 or 5 hours)
2. Try to have balanced, satisfying meals that you enjoy!
Take a moment to have a think about what meals you might have throughout the day (this isn’t rigid food planning - you can change your mind if you prefer something else when the time comes!) Try to include meals that you find satisfying and you enjoy. We know that satisfaction is a major factor in satiety and fullness (which is one of the principles of intuitive eating).
Many people find eating balanced meals (with a mix of fats, carbohydrates and protein) more satisfying as it’s giving your body a bit of everything it needs to keep going. Sometimes when we cut out a particular food group, we can have had enough caloric energy and can feel full but it feels like there’s something missing. Think of having a salad with no carbohydrates and then spending the rest of the evening rummaging in the cupboards for something sweet and tasty.
Takeaway tips:
Plan satisfying, yummy meals and snacks you enjoy
Try including a mix of fats, carbohydrates and proteins to increase satiety (and pleasure!)
3. Add in stress reduction activities and self-care (earlier in the day)
Evening bingeing or overeating is often tied to stress, boredom, or other emotions. There’s nothing wrong with emotional eating at times, but when it is your main way of coping with life it might be helpful to add in some stress reducing activities throughout the day to make bingeing less needed and give other options when life gets hard.
Add small stress-reduction techniques into your day: No one can tell you what helps you to reduce stress. You might know what helps or you could experiment with a few different techniques like deep breathing, journaling, spending time with friends or going for a walk after work.
The idea isn’t that these activities will magically get rid of all the stress in your life (a lot of that might be caused by things outside of your control!) but they can nudge your nervous system into a slightly lower level of activation, which when done consistently over time can reduce your base stress levels and make life feel a bit easier to cope with.
Create a self-care routine: for some people overeating is the only way they can take care of or reward themselves. Experiment with doing something really kind for yourself (this could be everyday or you can choose moments that feel right for you). This can feel really difficult for many of us but give it a try and experiment with what works for you (e.g. taking a relaxing bath, doing yoga, reading your favourite book or watching your favourite movie, lighting candles or using your favourite crockery during meals).
Remember: the goal of adding in these activities ISN’T to force yourself to stop eating. A lot of the advice out there is about trying to use these kinds of activities to replace bingeing or compulsive eating. This can be extremely difficult or even impossible for many to do in practice. The goal is to create space to explore other ways of caring for yourself and reduce stress (which helps prevent evening overeating in the long run).
Takeaway tips:
Experiment with stress reducing activities and find ones you like that you can add into your routine.
Do something really kind for yourself (perhaps everyday or whenever feels right for you).
4. Get (a bit!) more conscious whilst eating
This isn’t about perfect ‘mindful eating’, but rather, trying to stay a bit more conscious whilst eating. Many of us use food and eating to zone out, block or numb our emotional experience, this could be watching TV whilst eating or in some other way.
Staying a bit more conscious could look different for different people. Perhaps listening to a podcast or music instead of watching TV helps you feel more aware of what you’re eating. For others it might be using a plate and sitting at a table rather than eating standing up or next to the fridge. Or you might take a few moments without distractions at the beginning or end of the meal to concentrate on the flavour and textures of the food - the ‘yum factor’ (which could also enhance your satisfaction!)
It might be best to try this first with meals that are less emotionally charged like breakfast or lunch earlier in the day and then move onto dinner and evening eating once that feels like a comfortable habit.
Take away tips:
Try listening to music or a podcast instead of TV, use a plate or sit at a table and notice if you feel more conscious of your eating
Take a few moments to notice how tasty the flavours and textures of your food is without distraction
Start with less emotionally charged meals earlier in the day and find what feels comfortable to you then try evening meals and snacks
These small shifts can help you feel more satisfied with your meals, more emotionally aware and make it less likely you’ll seek extra comfort from food later.
5. Give yourself permission to eat all foods
If certain foods are on your ‘forbidden’ list, they may hold more power over you. Foods that are forbidden tend to ‘glimmer’ to us and can occupy our thoughts. This could be specific foods, processed foods or entire food groups. When you finally eat them, you might feel out of control because they’re tied to feelings of guilt or scarcity.
Try gradually exposing yourself to these foods during the day. For example, if you tend to binge on chocolate at night, allow yourself some of your favourite chocolate as part of a planned meal or snack, letting your body and your psychology know that chocolate is allowed. Over time, this can reduce the ‘forbidden fruit’ effect (also known as the ‘exposure effect’) and help you feel more at ease around that food.
Takeaway tips:
Give yourself permission to eat all foods.
Make a list of your forbidden foods. Gradually expose yourself to them by eating manageable amounts as part of planned meals or snacks earlier in the day.
6. Consider sharing your process with someone you trust
Bingeing and out of control eating can bring up feelings of shame or embarrassment. One way of conquering this is to share your experience with someone you trust. A friend, family member, or therapist can provide support and remind you that there’s nothing to be ashamed of.
If you’ve overeaten, reach out to someone you feel safe with and share how you’re feeling. You can decide how much you want to share with them. This small act can be incredibly healing and reduce the emotional weight of the experience.
Takeaway tips:
Consider sharing how you feel after overeating with someone you trust.
7. Seek professional support when needed
A lot of people experiencing eating issues feel like their issues are not ‘bad enough’ or that they don’t deserve help. This isn’t true - everyone deserves help and to feel peaceful around food, eating and their bodies.
If evening bingeing continues to feel overwhelming or unmanageable, reaching out to a therapist or counsellor can provide additional tools and guidance. Recovery is a process, and there’s no shame in seeking help to support your journey.
Takeaway tips:
Empower yourself to ask for help if you need it. You could explore therapy through a therapist directory site, health insurance or speak to your doctor if you’re not sure where to turn.
A compassionate reminder
Changing eating patterns takes time and patience, especially if they’ve been around for a while. You’re not failing if you slip up - you’re learning. Each step you take towards a healthier relationship with food is progress, and every effort you make is worth celebrating.
You deserve compassion, care and nourishment - no matter what. ❤️
If this resonates with you, know that there’s hope ahead. Take it one day at a time, and remember: you are never alone in this journey.
